I’ve just finished reading him the project we decided on this summer—a picture book they’ve all written and will illustrate—when he looks at me and grins.
“Are we going to sell it, Mama?” he says, because he’s 8, and he’s always looking for ways to make money, this little entrepreneur.
“Of course we are,” I say. “But we still have to do a lot of work from here.”
“Okay,” he says.
And he gets back to work, poring through all those picture books to see how many pages are in them and how many pages his book will need to have and how we’ll break up all that text to match with pictures.
It all came about after a school’s-out dreaming session, which we do every summer, to talk about what we will do with our summer and what project we’ll create in the free days we have.
All three of our older boys chose to write books (which made their mama so happy).
I knew it was a lot of work, because I do this on a daily basis, and so we sat down to have a dreaming session, talking about what our projects would look like and how they would be completed and how much time we would need from start to finish.
We planned how to put feet on our dreams—feet that will run and jump and play and accomplish what is in our hearts to do.
We do this often with our children.
The practice began back when we chose our family values and added “We unveil dreams” as an important one. We had our first dream session where we dreamed about what we wanted to be when we grew up (parents included). And then made a plan of pursuit.
We conduct Dream Sessions with our kids periodically during the year, to evaluate whether our dreams have changed and whether we’re still on a path of pursuit or we’ve gotten a little sidetracked. We share our dreams with our children, and they share their dreams with us. We dream family dreams.
Dreams are important to our children. Dreaming together is important for our children. The time we take to engage with them this way shows them that we believe in them, that we believe they can become what they dream they’ll become, with enough hard work and effort. Dream Sessions show our children that they have the potential to change the world. They communicate our knowledge and our expertise and, most importantly, our belief that they have it in them.
The first dream session we had, our oldest, who was 5 at the time, said he wanted to be a cinematographer. Since that dream has not changed all these years later (he’s 8 now), he continues to study videography. He reads biographies about people like George Lucas and Walt Disney to learn how to animate. He reads every comic book he can get his hands on, because he knows that a foundation in story and pictures is what it takes to be a successful videographer. He studied a screenwriting book to learn the techniques necessary for writing a good screenplay.
It’s not unusual that I will find original comic books he’s written and left on his desk or my bed or the kitchen table, because he set down a dream and he is working toward it.
Our kids are natural dreamers. They don’t know the limits of possibility and impossibility. We can learn how to dream by watching our children.
We don’t tell them what’s possible and what’s not, because we don’t ever know, either. Just because it wasn’t possible in our life doesn’t mean it’s not in theirs. Because something else dreaming does is it teaches kids that dreaming takes hard, intentional work. Anyone who puts in the work can achieve a dream, but the work must be put in.
Jesus dreamed of a church that would meet needs and take care of the people and love them for who they were and wherever they were in their faith. So he did the work, keeping his disciples close, teaching them, helping them see the work they would have to do when he was gone.
Jesus was a dreamer. He was a teacher.
I want to be like him.
How to hold a Dreaming Session with young children:
1. Get the crafts out. Have them draw pictures of what they want to be when they grow up. Sometimes kids need a little help with this one, but if they say “Batman,” which is what my 3-year-old wants to be when he grows up, see it for the spirit behind it. He wants to keep the city safe from bad guys. Help him learn how to do that.
2. Start a dream folder for your child. Put snippets of newspaper or magazine clippings or a list of links and resources to help them learn more about their dream. If you know how to do what they dream about doing, share your expertise.
3. Periodically evaluate with your children what they’re doing to achieve their dreams. Dreams aren’t worth much without a plan. Help your children make plans and constantly adjust plans as their dreams change. We hold Dream Sessions once a quarter.
